Winnipeg Jets Doppelgangers: Look-A-Likes Part III

In Part II, I promised to retire this premise. Much like the Godfather franchise, however, I’ve decided to do an ill-advised threequel. With that, here are some more Winnipeg Jets doppelgangers:

Winnipeg Jets Blake Wheeler and Kevin Stenlund

Look-a-like rating (out of 10): Based on their facial profile alone, a tentative 6. In totality, however, a strong 8.

Summary: Raise your hand if you have ever mistaken Kevin Stenlund for Blake Wheeler while watching a Winnipeg Jets game. The eerily similar size, posture, skating style, and even their jersey number (26/28) make it difficult to distinguish between the two.

If they were playing on the same line (which at this stage they probably should be), we would call it “Attack of the Clones”. Like the movie, it would be dissatisfying.

Other Similarities: I hate to get overly scientific, but they are both Virgos. Virgos are known for being practical, sensible, and loyal. Given how admirably Wheeler has handled his diminished role this season, I would say that the reading is accurate – and we would be foolish to ever question the legitimacy of astrological profiling.

On Stenlund: Stenlund had a middling training camp, and was sent back to the Moose rather summarily. In 19 games with the Moose, he scored 4 goals and added 10 assists. He was then activated back to the big club as an injury backup – where he has remained ever since. Stenlund (right now) is the Jets’ best faceoff man and has played solid in limited minutes.

Winnipeg Jets Kyle Capobianco and Chris Hemsworth

Look-a-like rating (out of 10): This is a solid 8.

Summary: “The eyes are the window to the soul” is a cheesy line you likely wrote to an ex-girlfriend in your 20s, but these two share a soulful look. Unfortunately, only one of them has superpowers – fictional or otherwise. The “Thor” saga is primarily about a man trying to find a home, and Kyle might be similarly afflicted after this season.

Other Similarities: In this year’s Winnipeg Jets Skills Competition, Capobianco registered an impressive 97.6 mph slap shot – good for third highest in the competition. While not a “hammer” necessarily, the “God of Thunder” would be proud.

On Capobianco: The life of an NHLer is not always as glamourous as fans perceive it to be. Drafted in the 3rd round by the Arizona Coyotes in 2015, Capobianco has played a total of 67 NHL games in 8 years. It appears as though he has spent much of his time in the Press Box. Kudos to the journeyman of this league.

British actor Tom Hopper (Photo by Juan Aguado/WireImage)

Winnipeg Jets Dominic Toninato and Tom Hopper

Look-a-like rating (out of 10): Some quick googling will produce a better likeness, but this is a 7.

Summary: You might not recognize Tom Hopper….. or Dominic Toninato for that matter. Hopper plays dashing English rogues in erotic fantasy fiction (Game of Thrones/The Umbrella Academy). Dominic ‘The Italian Tornado’ currently plays for the Moose after a brief stint with the Jets. Both are role players.

Other Similarities: Both gentlemen are looking for their big breakout. Toninato played 77 uneventful games last year with Winnipeg, however, Coach Bones has decided to look elsewhere for forward depth. Hopper seems to have transitioned to starring in terrible Netflix romantic comedies- which is basically the AHL of acting.

On Toninato: It’s admittedly a 1 game sample size, but The Tornado looked stellar at my first Moose game this year. He scored the game-winning goal in overtime and had numerous breakaways. He displayed NHL talent – but consistency is always the key to sustaining NHL playing time.

Winnipeg Jets Karson Kuhlman and Wayne Rooney

Look-a-like rating (out of 10): an 8.

Summary: Both guys could play Bond henchman.

Other Similarities: Internationally renowned star of the most popular sport on the plant vs. plebeian NHLer. Similarities are nary to be found.

On Kuhlman: On December 13, 2023 the Jets claimed Kuhlman off of waivers after he was released by the Seattle Kraken. Kuhlman has good speed, decent puck awareness, and even had a dalliance in the top 6 when injuries ravaged the Jets roster. Undrafted in 2018, Kuhlman is yet another noble journeyman the Jets seem to collect.

Winnipeg Jets’ Dylan DeMelo and Super Mario

Look-a-like rating (out of 10): I know, I know.

Summary: Obviously this is a moustache play. DeMelo seems to relish the spectacular nature of his moustache, even back in his days in Ottawa:

On DeMelo: Dylan is sidelined for a few games with a “Lower Body” and the Jets missed him dearly against the Philadelphia Flyers. DeMelo  is second in WAR and GAR this year behind only his playing partner Josh Morrissey. His absence also forces Morrissey to play with Pionk, which becomes a defensive liability. Or, in Super Mario parlance –  game over.

Bringing in Nintendo characters signifies the closing of a chapter for doppelgangers. The Winnipeg Jets need some help closing out this season. Some real stars are required – not just look-a-likes.